Wednesday, December 12, 2012

Benefits and Drawbacks to Being a Science Major

One of the perks of being a biology/health sciences major is that one generally knows which health symptoms are minor and which symptoms are not. This can be fortunate as it can allow you to waive aside a cramp or strain etc. However, it can be unpleasant because you know the symptoms that can be indicative of much bigger problems.


Isn't this awesome? My lab partner and I took this picture
of nerve cells (neurons, if you want to know)! It's so
 amazing to think that we have billions of these guys in
our bodies! 
Therefore, you can imagine my peaceful delight this morning when I found that my hand kept going numb. Yay. It doesn't take a degree to know that this is something you can't ignore.

Numbness and tingling is often associated with nerve damage. Yay again.
Had I sustained an injury, this might have been expected. However, I hadn't been in a car accident or something like that, so the numbness was definitely concerning.

One of the disadvantages of having just studied the nervous system in Advanced Anatomy and Physiology is (cue: suspenseful music) being aware of the pathological issues involving nerves.

We all know that knowledge is power and with great power comes great....jumping to conclusions, right?

So therefore the only logical reaction to my problem was to think: "Ahhhhh! I'm going to lose mobility, my brain is going to stop working due to a brain tumor and now I'm going to die!" 

Or something like that.


I was able to conference with my mother (who used to be a nurse) and she was concerned as well. Great.  Now off to school to go learn more nerve pathology about neural innervation of the ears. 

...

Now, you ask, didn't you think about God or spiritual things at this point? 

Well, whether or not it actually crossed my mind that I may die younger than St. Therese of Lisieux (who died at 24) is up to your imagination. ;) 

Seriously though, what really struck me is how hard it was to just trust in God whatever was going on. I know my situation was quite different from someone who truly was suffering from a terminal disease, but if it were a sort of "dry run" for that I definitely failed. 

The thing about a situation like this, is you get stripped down of all pretension and imagined holiness and you realize how small you really are--how small your love is.

You begin to realize how much you need God's grace. 

You find that the amount of effort you are putting into loving God and neighbor is much less than what is possible for you to give.

On one hand this can be very discouraging, but on the other hand it is a much needed breath of fresh air. 

You see, it is very humbling to find that you are really not the king of the universe. 

When your soul is naked and you see that you cannot even control what happens to your own body, you find your rightful place in life: a creature placed at the feet of the Creator. 
Utterly helpless, but for his grace. 



Yet this knowledge is so freeing. For you are no longer bound by the "imagination of your heart", pride. 

God is good. I am learning how small I really am. How much I need God's grace. I pray that I may grow in love of God and truly align my priorities in life.

Happy feast day! 

Follow up to the numbness: Although I still am experiencing it, we believe that I probably pinched/tore a nerve in my shoulder Monday night (by pulling something heavy from across the car). Thanks be to God it is nothing worse.